I am excited to share this guest post with you by Deborah Fingerlow of Riding the Dime. This is a different kind of post on Women Winning Online and one that I love! It has helped me personally re-examine how I want to help you, my reader. Please let both Deborah and I know what you think of this post in the comments below. And take a moment to check out Deborah’s other great posts on her blog!

“No one is gifted in everything.”  I’ll never forget the conversation with a high school counselor I had years ago.  And she was right.  Much like parenting, marketing your own business and curating your success is a matter of choosing battles and focusing on your gifts.  No one does everything well.  The key is focusing on your strengths and picking strategies that complement you.  Bottom line?  To thine own self be true.

As entrepreneurs, we tend to “do all the things.”  While it’s true we need a strategy, no where does it say we need to do everything at the same time.  There is an order to a strategic plan.  

There is chaos in a vacuum.

Having a plan doesn’t mean that your business is set in stone.  It does mean that you’ve discovered the all-important why and have a direction in mind.  Finding Your Tribe Online can lend you a hand finding your people, but entrepreneur Jennifer Snyder knows the why comes first.  Without direction, we tend to gravitate toward every shiny object, without taking the time to research what is a good fit for us personally.  We fill the empty space with whatever we stumble across surfing for answers to make this easier.

Stop.  Breathe. Think.

When was the last time more stuff made you happy?  Is it easier to clean your house if you bring every cleaning agent and tool to the forefront, filling your living space?  It just gets in the way, so we pull out what we need for the job at hand.  Your blog or business is your living space.  Don’t muck it up with everything online simply because it’s free.  Be picky, choose wisely and leave yourself room to maneuver.  

Be the Genuine Article

I’ve been a professional writer for years.  I’m a little old school in that when I started writing, technology dictated that I spin my stories for local clients, lugging a huge, black leather portfolio along to show my “clips.”  Hard to believe, right?

So, when I entered the fray and began blogging and writing for clients across the globe, I wanted to be “hip” or “cool” or whatever everyone is these days.  I kind of wanted to have that edgy-bad-girl feel.  It was embarrassingly horrible.  Thank goodness I was able to find how to delete FaceBook posts immediately.  As soon as I saw the words in front of me, cursor blinking maddeningly, I knew I’d made a mistake.  I’m not pink or edgy, and I text in full sentences.  

Who on earth did I think I was kidding?

No one.

I am straightforward and direct, always.  I will ask anyone anything, and my greatest skill lies in making connections and listening to what people have to say.  I love that moment of engagement, that spark of commonality.  That is who I am.  Maybe a little nerdy, not enough to be trendy, but certainly enough to be disarming and trustworthy.  We can converse because I am genuinely interested.  And that’s when you get the best stories.

How can I be genuine when the market is flooded?

It isn’t.  I used to think the same thing until I heard Sean McCabe speak.  He reminded me that it just seems like everyone is in the same business, given where we hang out.  Most of the world isn’t actually doing what we’re doing.  It’s hard sometimes to keep that perspective.  If we can back up for a “forest-for-the-trees” moment, you’ll see that maintaining your authentic voice is what separates you from everyone else.

My mother used to tell me that “not everyone is going to like you.”  She was right about that. (Not to mention countless other things.)  And it’s perfectly okay, and a far better choice than trying to mold yourself into something you are not.  That’s one of the benefits of owning your own business, right?  You get to be you.

But, what if I do it wrong?

Own it.

We all make mistakes.  We all doubt ourselves from time to time.  We all wish for the occasional do-over.  Keep in mind that people respect vulnerability and mistakes, provided we learn from it.  I’ll go out on a limb here and say that one of Jennifer Snyder’s most read, most commented posts was when she was feeling a little overwhelmed by trying to perfectly balance work and family life.  People responded en masse not because she had all the answers, but because she was honest enough to admit that she didn’t.  Better yet, she shared her action plan and issued a call to action for all of us.  That is genuine, authentic and it draws us in because we can relate.

Staying in Your Lane

It might sound bad when you first hear that.  Stay in my lane?  Shouldn’t I try new and different strategies?  Shouldn’t I stretch myself, go beyond my comfort zone?  

Absolutely.

Staying in your lane is simply a reminder to be true to yourself.  We each know our own hearts best.  We each know that we want to grow and change and flourish.  Who doesn’t?  But we need to remember that success is individual to each of us.  Having “all the things” won’t make us successful, and certainly trying to do “all the things” doesn’t.  Finding your sweet spot may take a little time.  I’m living proof that it’s trial and error.  

But my sweet spot is right here, talking with you, cup of Irish Breakfast tea in hand.  I am interested in your story, how you got here and where you want to go next.

Now what?

The choice is yours.  Keep that vision of who you are in mind as you decide what strategies will work best for you.  At the start, you need to know these key things:

Why am I doing this?

Who am I, and who are they (my audience)?

Where am I going?

What three things will allow me to share my message best?

My mantra:  I’m better than good enough.

And so are you.  Somehow you made the decision to begin.  Give yourself the same credit and respect you so easily give others.  You are better than good enough.

To thine own self be true.  That’s something we can all respect.  So, what’s your story?

Deborah Fingerlow is a writer, traveler and explorer seeking adventures both large and small.  Business to business communications and the development of authentic connections are her superpowers.  You can find her at the local farmer’s market, therapy dogs in tow, camera in hand.  Catch up with her on her blog at www.ridingthedime.com and check our her website at www.deborahfingerlow.com. 

If you’d like to connect better with the folks around you, sign up for her free, 5-day email course, Stop. Smile. Connect. http://ridingthedime.com/lets-talk/.

“Life is a grand adventure; don’t be afraid of taking a wrong turn.  Embrace it, and own your decision.”

I am excited to share with you my first guest poster on Women Winning Online! Emily McGee of The Adaptable Career is sharing with us 15 lessons she learned about time management her first year blogging. I know time management is something that is a battle for us all, me included. I am grateful that Emily is here to share what she has learned and how her experience can help us manage our time more effectively!

I’ve been blogging for just over a year now, and it’s taken me almost that long to get a handle on my schedule and to do list. If you’re new to blogging or struggling with time management, you can learn from my mistakes! Here are 15 time management lessons I learned in my first year of blogging.

1. Done is better than perfect.

I’m a perfectionist, and I used to wear that title with pride. But it recently dawned on me that my perfectionism is just a form of procrastination. I could spend days perfecting one blog post, or I could spend 2 hours on a post. With a new baby and an international move on the horizon, I’m focusing on “good enough,” and not “perfect.” It’s the only way I’ll get all my blogging work done!

Takeaway: Your audience doesn’t expect you to be perfect, so focus on getting things done and not making them perfect.

2. There’s never a “right” time to do anything.

My mom once said to me, “There’s never a right time to have a baby.” Yes, she wanted to be a grandma, but she also had a point. There is never going to be a perfect time to have a baby, or launch a blog, or create your first e-course. In fact, the perfect time is probably now, so stop waiting and get moving!

Takeaway: Take the plunge on your big blog project. If you wait for the perfect time, you’ll be waiting forever.

3. Keep your goal front and center.

One of the best and worst parts about blogging is that there are a million different things you could do. I’m constantly battling FOMO and shiny object syndrome, especially when I hear about a new tactic that worked for some other blogger. In 2016, I didn’t have a clear goal for myself, but this year I’ve written my goal down and hung it on the bulletin board over my desk. Now that I see my goal daily, it’s much easier to stay focused on the daily tasks that will help me get there.

Takeaway: Get clear on your big goal, then write down your goal on a notecard and hang it over your desk.

4. Say no as often as possible.

There will always be tons of “opportunities,” for guest posting, for promoting in FB group promo threads, for collaborations, and for taking new courses, but my time is limited. Last year, I said yes to a lot of projects that didn’t lead anywhere. This year, I’m saying no to everything that doesn’t directly help me reach my goal.

Takeaway: You’ve only got 24 hours in a day, so learn to prioritize and protect your time by saying “no.”

5. There are no shortcuts.

I often tried to save time or be more productive by following other blogger’s advice. Guess what? Nothing magical happened. Lots of people promise amazing results or a fast track to blogging success. But the reality is that even with the right strategies and tools, it still just takes good old fashioned hard work to reach your goals.

Takeaway: Stop looking for shortcuts and do the work that will get results.

6. Energy management is the secret to great productivity.

I got pregnant the same week I started my blog. Between the morning sickness and the exhaustion of pregnancy, I learned pretty quickly that I only had a few hours of productive work time each day. By doing the hardest work during those high energy times, I was able to get so much more done then when I tried to push through my exhaustion.

Takeaway: Figure out when you have the most energy and make it a priority to work on your blog during those times.

7. Be realistic about how much time you have for your blog/biz.

I’m pretty ruthless about tracking my time, and it’s been really helpful for me to see that I only worked about 10 hours a week last year on my blog. Knowing how much time I really had for my blog has helped me come up with realistic goals for each week, month, and year.

Takeaway: Don’t compare yourself or your accomplishments with bloggers who are doing this full-time. Your goal has to match how much time you have available.

8. Get used to feeling like you never have enough time.

In other jobs this would stress me out, but when you have your own business, it’s a reality. On the plus side, I’m really motivated and I’m never bored!

Takeaway: It’s normal to feel overwhelmed, but see if you can turn that into a positive thing, like motivation to get even more done with your blog.

9. Busy is not the same as productive.

I’m very good at staying busy. I’ll pin, and work on my editorial calendar, and schedule tweets and fill my day with all sorts of blog-related tasks. But one of the biggest lessons I learned in my first year of blogging is that not all of these tasks are created equal. This year I’m trying to be less busy and more productive. I’m focusing my energy and my limited work time on the tasks that will actually help me earn money from my blog: things like creating a course, creating new lead magnets to grow my email list, and writing and revising my sales funnel.

Takeaway: Make sure that every single thing you work on is getting you closer to your goal.

10. It’s okay to take a nap.

I was pregnant for most of 2016, and then had my baby in October. My word of the year: tired. I was tired all the time. I tried pushing through the tired, but that just made me cranky. Plus, blogging felt so much harder when I was doing it tired. Eventually I just gave into napping in the afternoons. And you know what? I got the same amount of work done. I pushed myself harder in the mornings, when I had the energy and knew that I finished my task list I’d be rewarded with a nap. Then I’d take a nap with my toddler. We would both wake up refreshed and ready to take on the rest of the day. From my time management research, I also learned that naps can make you more productive, so now I nap guilt-free!

Takeaway: Even if naps aren’t your thing, remember that taking a break is good for you. Don’t push through fatigue, the quality of your work will suffer.

11. Limit input to maximize output.

I’ve noticed that I get more done when I have less stimulus coming in. With this in mind, I try to limit my non-work screen time. I don’t watch T.V. or movies (we don’t even own a T.V.). I use social media to network and promote my business, but rarely for personal reasons. When I was creating content for my course, I didn’t even read, which is normally my favorite hobby. Limiting these distractions freed my mind and increased my creativity and productivity.

Takeaway: What distractions or mental clutter can you eliminate from your life?

12. Momentum matters most.

Momentum is an important but often overlooked aspect of time management. For me, nothing can ruin the day faster than feeling like I got nothing done. I found that I could build momentum by keeping a realistic schedule and to do list. The more successful I felt at getting things done, the more motivated I was to keep working on my blog.

Takeaway: Don’t overschedule yourself. Write an achievable goal, make a plan you can stick to. Creating positive habits and experiences around your blog will motivate you to continue.

13. There’s a balance between planning enough and overplanning.

I’m an overplanner. I love using my paper planner and could spend hours creating the perfect schedule for myself. With blogging, there is always more planning I could do, too. I could plan my editorial calendar! I could plan my newsletter content! I could plan my guest post pitches! Seriously, I could spend all my time planning, and none of my time doing. In 2017, I’ve resolved to spend a little less time planning so I have more time to actually put those plans into action.

Takeaway: Make sure you’re not procrastinating by overplanning.

14. Carbs are not your friend.

Don’t worry, I’m not pushing some strange diet. But this summer I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes and put on a regimented diet that included a lot more fat and protein and much fewer carbs than I was used to. And even though I was in the 3rd trimester of pregnancy, I had so much more energy than normal. Since having the baby I’ve stuck with higher protein meals and snacks and I continue to have a lot more energy throughout the day.

Takeaway: If you’re trying to be more productive make sure your lifestyle choices are supporting you.

15. Sometimes you gotta hustle, and sometimes you gotta coast.

Have I whined enough about that pregnancy yet? 😉 During the first trimester of my pregnancy, I was completely exhausted and overwhelmed by morning sickness. I did the bare minimum to keep my blog alive and tried to take good care of myself. It was my time for coasting, not for growing my blog.

On the other hand, when I was getting ready to launch my course I usually woke up at 4 or 5 am to take care of chores and household stuff so that I could devote the whole morning (aka preschool hours) to working on the course. I stopped reading and exercising and turned down social invitations so that I could use every spare moment to prep for the launch. Did I sustain this hustle indefinitely? Heck no! That’s the benefit of running your own business. You can have periods of intense work and periods when you back off a little.

Takeaway: Hard work and showing up every day are important, but it’s also important to be realistic about what season of life you’re in. Don’t feel bad if you’re not able to hustle as hard as the next person, taking care of your own physical and mental health should come first.

In Conclusion:

What a great post filled with golden nuggets of information! Thank you Emily for this excellent post!

To recap, Emily shared with us these 15 tips and takeaways about blogging and time management:

1. Done is better than perfect
2. There’s never a “right” time to do anything
3. Keep your goal front and center
4. Say no as often as possible
5. There are no shortcuts
6. Energy management is the secret to great productivity
7. Be realistic about how much time you have for your blog/biz
8. Get used to feeling like you never have enough time
9. Busy is not the same as productive
10. It’s okay to take a nap
11. Limit input to maximize output
12. Momentum matters most
13. There’s a balance between planning enough and overplanning
14. Carbs are not your friend
15. Sometimes you gotta hustle, and sometimes you gotta coast

What was your favorite tip from Emily or do you have something you would like to add? Please share it with us in the comments below! 

Are you looking to save time when it comes to getting more blog traffic? Check out Find Your Tribe Online!

Emily McGee is the founder of My Adaptable Career, where she helps busy bloggers and solopreneurs manage their time better so they can reach their goals faster. If you ever think to yourself “If only I had more time, I’d get so much more done!” then sign up for Master Time Management, her free 5-day email course for bloggers and solopreneurs.

Find Emily at: My Adaptable Career | Pinterest | Twitter | Facebook | Instagram

On Thanksgiving Day 2014 I woke up at 6am, far earlier than anyone else at my house. I was not thrilled about being awake at all. It was dark and it was cold (really cold– more on that later), and my reason for being awake did not thrill me either.

The Turkey Trot

A few weeks before Thanksgiving I agreed to do the Turkey Trot 5k in St. Paul with three of my friends. Now I had done one 5k, about a month before Thanksgiving I ran my first one in honor of breast cancer. That one meant something to me. I was running it on the 5 year anniversary to the date of the day my cousin passed away from breast cancer. She was only 28. I did it to honor her memory and her hard fight against that awful disease. That 5k I could get behind and I felt a little spiritual push the whole way.

The Turkey Trot? Not so much. This one felt more like peer pressure to me, but kind of like fun too.

Now if you would have ever told me that I said a 5k was fun I would have laughed at you. Laughed hard until I cried. You see I vowed never to be one of those people that was going to run for fun. I was never going to be one of those “crazies.” I hated running and had no desire to be a runner.

A Million Excuses

Yet here I was, this very cold November morning getting ready to run the Turkey Trot. It was -6 in temperature, not wind chill, but temperature, at race time. It was the coldest Thanksgiving in the Twin Cities in 30 years.  I was here ready to run the Turkey Trot. Something I vowed I would never do and especially not in the dead cold of winter. Even worse, I had barely slept the night before as my youngest was up every hour because of a cold. I wasn’t in the best of moods and I had a million excuses running through my head of why I didn’t have to go to this race. Even my friends were shocked when they came to pick me up that I came out the front door.

Sure peer pressure got me here and a little bit of fun got me here, but you want to know what really got me to that starting line? Taking a leap out of my comfort zone and doing something that challenged me. A giant leap. I am not a runner, I don’t even consider myself in shape, but I was up for trying something new, something different and something that would be a challenge. Why not? As long as it wouldn’t kill me, I was game for it. I was nervous and I was scared of course. I was worried that I would be the only one there that would have to walk, that my friends would leave me in the dust, and would be waiting for me for an hour at the finish line. I was even kind of scared that I would trip and fall flat on my face or even worse break something. But I was determined to step out of my comfort zone and try something new. Something that was for me, something that would challenge me, something that was for personal growth.

Myself (1st on the left) and my 3 crazy friends

My Comfort Zone

In 2016 I took a huge leap of faith and stepped outside of my comfort zone. You see I had been involved in the real estate industry as far back as I could remember. I remember “working” in the family business as early as age seven. By the time I was 10 I was being paid to type real estate appraisals. Over the years I worked as an assistant to appraisers, title closers, and Realtors. I spent time working as a Loan Officer for five years and got out just before the market tanked. But right around that time I took off on my own branch of real estate and began doing real estate marketing.

Then last year happened and something inside of me said, after 27 years in the same industry, it was time to be done. It was time to try the dream that had been on my heart for the last few years. I would love to say “and just like that Women Winning Online was born.” But that wouldn’t be the whole story. That wouldn’t tell you how absolutely terrified I was to leave an industry that I knew like the back of my hand, to pursue something that was just a dream. Something that I had no idea what I was doing and if it would work or not.

But just like the Turkey Trot, I knew if I didn’t do it, I would always wonder if I could.  I would always wonder if I missed something that would be good for me. That would stretch me and take me far outside of my comfort zone of real estate.

On February 8th, one day after my 37th birthday, Women Winning Online was officially born. I was officially outside of my comfort zone and on a new journey.

Your Comfort Zone

Every day we have the opportunity to step outside our comfort zones, but we rarely do. We have a million excuses of why we don’t have to. It’s scary. We don’t want to fail. We don’t want to look dumb. We don’t have time. We don’t have money. Yet when we take that challenge and do something different, a small piece of us changes and usually for the better.

As a blogger you have the opportunity to step outside of your comfort zone on a daily basis and become better at what you do. To take a challenge that will push you as a blogger. To do something different that you haven’t done before like sending out your first email newsletter or finally launching that program that has been on your mind for years.

You have the opportunity to evaluate what is and isn’t working for your blog. Is it time to let go of your Facebook page because it isn’t bringing you in much traffic and focus on Instagram instead? Or is it worth it to start investing in your blog and in yourself to learn marketing ideas that will help you grow? It’s hard to invest in ourselves isn’t it? We worry that we aren’t worth the investment or that our efforts won’t work. We worry that we will waste our time and our money and end up right where we were before. Or worse, right where we were before with nothing to show for it and less money in our pocketbooks too.

But what if you stepped outside of your comfort zone? What if you took the time to invest in you? It could mean the difference between saying stuck where you are right now or taking that leap of faith and watching your blog grow in ways you’ve only dreamed of. Then would it be worth it to step outside of your comfort zone?

As the summer comes to a close, we are gearing up to get back to our blogs. Back to the routine and the consistency that this season brings before the holidays hit. Before we know it we are going to be knee deep in blog planning and goal setting for next year. I would venture to guess that you had a good year blogging but you want to do even more in 2017.

You know how you get there? You add working outside your comfort zone into your plans for next year. Yes, keep doing the blogging tasks that you know, that you love, and that you are good at, but take it one step further next year. Do marketing that you have always wanted to try but were too scared to do. Launch a program that will help your niche become better. Step outside of your comfort zone. That is where the magic happens, where growth as a blogger happens. This is the point where you and your blog really starts to grow and change for the better.

As for me, I can look back at 2016 and feel thrilled that I took that leap of faith. Whew! That scary leap of leaving the only industry I had known for 27 years. Not only did I get to follow my true passion, but I have met and helped some amazing women along the way. I know that 2017 is going to be a great year for all of us and that for me, my leap of faith outside of my comfort zone was worth it.

Oh and by the way it’s been almost two years since that 5k and I am still doing them and I still don’t love them! I wonder if that will ever change?!

What are your goals for your blog this fall and into 2017? Are you going to do the same things you did in 2016 or are you going to up your game and try new things? Please tell me about your plans in the comments below! Thank you!

Congratulations! You started that blog you’ve been dying to write for years and you’re excited. You live and breathe blogging. You soak up every post you can find on how to blog. You try experiments to see what is working and what isn’t working to drive traffic.

You have a blog and it’s safe to say you are in love.

If you are married, the start of your blog can also bring the start of problems in your marriage. I experienced this with my first blog. I was so in love with my blog! I was writing about ideas that had swirled around in my head for years. I was getting comments on my posts and attention on social media. I ate, breathed, and slept my blog.

The problem is when you become obsessed with blogging it is hard to make room for anything or anyone else. This includes your marriage, your family, and your friends.

And I get it. Not only do you love blogging, but it has the potential to bring in money that can support your whole family. That’s intoxicating!

But what if you work so hard to build your blog, are successful, and have no one left to enjoy it with?

It’s a sobering thought isn’t it? This is a slippery slope for sure, but the good news is that it’s avoidable if you recognize it can happen. Here are my five tips to blog-proof your marriage.

1. Schedule time with your spouse

As bloggers it is so easy to work after dinner or after the kids go to sleep. We think “this is our time to work.” We crave a few uninterrupted hours to write and edit our posts. To learn about social media and network with other bloggers. We have worked hard all day in our 9-5 or with our kids and we are ready to get our blog on!

But think back before you started blogging. Remember how after the kids went to bed it was time for you and your spouse to hang out? To debrief and learn about each other’s day. Or to connect about bigger things going on in your life. Now the minute the last kid is in bed you pop open your laptop and breathe a sigh of relief. Ah time to blog.

But I bet the majority of bloggers, myself included, don’t think about how this makes our spouse feel. They are used to connecting with us at night. Without a word we changed from connecting with them to connecting with our blog. That has to feel lonely for them.

How to fix it: When you don’t blog full-time, blogging at night is important. You need that time. But you also need time with your spouse to connect and unwind. My husband and I pick three days a week where I don’t work at night. This always includes Friday and Saturday night unless he is out. We also pick one night during the week to hang out even if it only means watching TV. When I give him my full attention those nights he feels important. He doesn’t mind when I am working the other three nights of the week.

P.S. Your spouse watching TV and you blogging doesn’t count as quality time! Your head is still in the blogging game and not connected with your spouse!

2. Put your phone down

Full confession: I am writing this point with full disclosure that I am the worst person I know at putting my phone down. If my husband could chime in here he would tell you all about it. Good thing it’s my blog so he can’t! 🙂

Blogging has become a mobile sport with the invention of smartphones and tablets, and I for one love that! With one little device I can connect with the women in my Facebook group, reply to blog comments, and schedule social media posts. Heck I can write a blog post from my phone if I want to. It’s awesome!

What’s not so awesome is when we abuse the technology. Sure we put down our laptops to stop blogging, but then we pick up our phones. We get in our Facebook groups, join Twitter chats, or work on graphics for our posts. We are still blogging, we’ve just changed the tool we are using to do it.

How to Fix It: This is something I am working on myself. Here’s are some simple things I have come up with. No phone at the dinner table or in bed. No phone on the nights designated as our time to hang out. Use it sparingly in the mornings when you and your spouse are getting ready for the day. Treat your phone like your laptop and give it boundaries. Like I said, this list is just as much for me as it is for you– maybe even more for me!

3. Go to bed at the same time

For the majority of our relationship, I usually went to bed after my husband. He would go to bed around 10pm and I would work until one or two in the morning. I figured why not? He was sleeping anyway so it’s not like I was missing quality time with him.

Yet I was missing quality time and I didn’t even realize it. And no, not that kind of quality time. There’s something about ending the day together that helps strengthen the marriage bond. Checking on the kids, brushing teeth, and a little pillow talk before shutting off the lights. There is intimacy in those small moments. Moments that you miss if you don’t go to bed at the same time as your spouse.

How to fix it: The nights that you choose as “couple nights” make sure to go to bed at the same time too. Those nights will fill you both up for the nights you stay up late and work on your blog. Every once in awhile shut down your work on the non-couple nights and go to bed with your spouse. It will make you both feel better!

4. Be an active listener

Active listening is something else I struggle with too. I see my husband talking but I don’t actually hear what he is saying. I nod my head in agreement and he knows me well enough to know that I wasn’t paying attention. Yes, I have put my phone and laptop away, but I haven’t shut my brain off. I am thinking about blog posts, my Facebook group, or mom stuff. But I am not being an active listener when he speaks and that isn’t fair to him.

How to Fix It: Now this is one I don’t think we can fix 100% of the time. We are women after all and we have a lot going on upstairs! But we can work on it in each conversation we have with our spouse.

Let your brain know when it is couple or date night. I say to myself “Okay tonight is couple night, time to focus on that and not the blog or the kids.” This simple reminder changes my focus from thinking about everything, to focusing on what my husband is saying.

5. Date night

You’re busy, your spouse is busy, and if you have kids you don’t even remember what it is like to not be busy. Now you are blogging on top of all this busyness. When do you make time to get out as a couple and enjoy yourselves? It’s hard to find the time isn’t it?

Yet there is something magical when you can get away from the house, the kids, your blog and enjoy a night on the town with your spouse. You feel renewed, your spouse feels renewed, and you marriage feels lighter. In our house, date nights aren’t an option but a necessity for survival.

How to Fix It: When was the last time you went on a date with your spouse? The last time you put it all away, put on nice clothes and gasp!– some make-up? If it has been awhile schedule a date night with your spouse. To keep date nights on the calendar take turns planning them every other month.

Blogging is a fun business, but it can be hard on your marriage if you aren’t careful. It is easy to get sucked into your blog and making it a success. But you don’t want to have all that success at the expense of your marriage.

Take time to walk away from your computer and phone at night to reconnect with your spouse. Give your spouse the best part of you by listening to them when they talk. Make sure to schedule couple time and date nights away from the house to connect with your spouse. Then when your blog becomes a raving success your number one fan will be there to share it with you!

Ah summer, my favorite season. Warmer days, longer nights, pool, and lake time. The kids are out of school and I dream about all the fun things we are going to do. This summer we are going to do it all I declare.

But then I panic. Sheer anxiety interrupts my daydream. I am a writer, a blogger, and I run a business. How am I going to manage that while the kids are on summer break?

Before a complete meltdown set in I knew I had to get a plan together and fast. You see my kids are at an age where we can do cool stuff this summer. I created this blog so I could have the free time to spend with them and not stick them in daycare while I slaved away at work.

I knew I had to create a balance between work and my kids. It’s an ongoing practice for me. I know there are weeks that are more kid heavy and weeks that are more heavy on the work side. I know for the next 8 weeks or so, my life will be more kid heavy and I need my blog to work around that schedule.

Are you feeling the same pull? You want to spend more time with your kids, but you want your blog to keep running? Here are my 9 tips to help you balance the two as best you can.

1. Make a Summer Schedule

I am a big planner. My lists have lists. So I knew the first thing I needed to do was create a summer schedule for myself and the kids. Now it being summer I didn’t want to make it too rigid. The entire school year is dedicated to a rigid schedule. But I wanted to make sure my blogging time was in our summer schedule. If I don’t schedule my blogging activities, including writing, they don’t get done.

Here’s what my schedule looks like this summer:

There is one thing that I don’t show on this schedule. Grace. I give myself grace when it doesn’t go according to plan. Today for example, I slept in and didn’t work on my blog post. It felt good and my body needed the break. Giving yourself grace with your schedule makes you more likely to stick to it instead of hating it.

P.S. I need to give credit to my ultra organized bloggy friend Suzi of Start a Mom Blog. She is fantastic when it comes to helping mom’s with their schedules!

2. Focus

Oh focus. You and I have a battle every day don’t we? Followed closely by your cousin self-discipline.

Here is what I do when I write a blog post.

• Check Facebook one last time before I start.
• Write my outline
• Check Facebook again
• Write my opening intro, “think” I’m stuck, check email.
• Get lost in the rabbit hole of email. Then go back to my post.
• Write a bit more and check Facebook for the 14th time today.

I wish I had a zapper for every time I strayed away from what I am supposed to be working on! But I realized if I have ANY shot of sticking to my schedule and enjoying time with my kids, I had to focus on the task at hand.

That means no Facebook and no email until I write the draft for my blog post. That means writing in 30 minute increments and giving myself a 5 minute break. That means being a grown up and realizing the more I focus, the easier it is to get the task done.

But I still wouldn’t mind that zapper. 😉

3. Boundaries

Setting boundaries is something else I struggle with. I have worked at home for 10 years now. People always say to me “I could never work at home because I would do laundry or clean the kitchen.”

Well I have the opposite problem. I am terrible at turning the work off.

Sure I can walk away from the computer when nap time is over, but then I take my handy iPhone with me everywhere I go. I check my Facebook group, I see if I have new email subscribers, or blog comments. I research new ways to drive traffic or new marketing ideas.

Before I know it I am wrapped up in work and snapping at my kids who just want my attention. That very attention I want to pour on them. The irony is not lost on me here. I am building a business that works around their schedule and not vice versa. Yet here I am putting the work ahead of their needs.

So I have to set boundaries, follow the designated work schedule I set out, and stick to it. This way I can enjoy the time with my kids to the fullest and not feel like a crappy mom.

4. Cut Back on Posting

If you are posting more than three days a week on your blog, I suggest cutting back on that during the summer. Heck, I don’t think that is a good idea anyway, but especially not during the summer.

If you try to keep up with a demanding posting schedule while your kids are home you will get frustrated. Unless you have outside help, you can’t write that often and spend quality time with your kids. I tried this and it was terrible. My content was awful and my mothering was not good.

Give yourself a break, enjoy your kids this summer, and cut back on your posting schedule! Let your readers know you are still blogging, just not as much during the summer. They will understand and respect you for it.

And hey, you might find that once school starts again that you like the lighter posting schedule. It might be just the thing to put a zip back into your writing!

5. Get Sleep

I made a startling confession to my best friend, Marci, last week. I like love getting up early now. Her gasp of shock made me realize how huge this is.

Up until a couple of years ago, I was a grown woman, mother of three, that loved to stay up until 1, 2, sometimes 3am working. I loved working while everyone was asleep and the house was quiet. I came alive about 9pm every night and my husband would say, “Guess it’s going to be a late night for you.”

But then one day it caught up with me. I couldn’t do it anymore. I would stay up late and was crabby the next day. I wasn’t at my best for my kids. My writing started to suffer. With the lack of sleep I found that I couldn’t think right and it was no longer worth it. So I started to go to bed at 10pm like normal people and get up early like normal people.

The result? I am happier, more productive, and enjoy my life more. Now if you would have told 30-year-old me that, I would have laughed at you. But with age comes wisdom and part of that wisdom includes getting a good night’s sleep.

And Marci, I know I can hardly believe I am writing this either. What happened to me?!

6. Look for Fringe Hours

Now that I am a grown up and get sleep, I have discovered I love the fringe hours! Fringe hours are the bonus hours you can work while your family is doing something else. I can get up at 5am and get two hours of work done before I am called to be a wife and a mom. Those are my favorite two hours every day! The house is quiet, I got a good night’s sleep, and once the coffee kicks in I am firing on all cylinders.

But the morning hours aren’t my only fringe hours. I also do blog tasks during certain times of the day. At lunch I let the kids watch TV and I do some work then. While my youngest is napping, my girls spend the first 30 minutes doing their own thing while I work. If we go to the park I will take that time to catch up on social media.

There are many different times during the day where my kids don’t need me. They are playing together or doing their own thing. During this time I will focus on easy blog tasks. It helps me stay on track without feeling like I am ignoring my kids.

7. Get a Babysitter

Mondays are my favorite day of the week. Crazy right?! Mondays are the one day a week I have a nanny come into my house to care for my kids.

I get a much-needed break from the kids (hey, I’m not super mom!) and the kids get interaction with someone besides their parents. I get to work in peace and quiet and focus on the big tasks at hand.

If you are struggling to find extra time, look at bringing in a babysitter if your budget allows it. Maybe you need a full day like me. Or maybe you can get by with three hours on Monday afternoon. There isn’t a law that says just because you stay home with your kids, that you can’t bring in help once in a while. You will be better off for it and so will your kids.

If you can’t fit a sitter into your budget, is there a mom in your area you can trade with? My best friend and I take turns watching each other’s kids so we can go on date nights with our husbands. Try to find another mom blogger in your area that you connect with and take turns helping each other out.

8. Ask your Spouse for Help

There is no shame whatsoever in asking for your husband’s help. If you need a break to work on your blog, ask your husband for help! My husband and I have an agreement that if I need a night off to write, he will come home from work and takeover. I leave the house right when he gets there and he is in charge of dinner and bedtime. When things get really busy we do this once a week. As an added bonus it gives my husband some one-on-one time with the kids. And they love to soak up their dad’s attention making it a win-win for all!

If you need the help ask your husband. He isn’t going to know you need help unless you ask. And don’t feel guilty about it either! Don’t forget you are at home with your kids and that is work all by itself. You have spent the time with them so now go spend some time on you.

9. Join a Gym

I joined a gym to exercise and lose weight, but there is an added benefit I didn’t realize at first. The kids daycare at the gym. Oh how I love that place!

When you drop your kids off they always ask you where you are going to be. One day the woman in front of me said “The Cafe.” I said “Wait a minute, hold the phone. It’s okay to drop the kids off and sit in the gym’s cafe?” They replied “We don’t care what you do, as long as you don’t leave the building.”

Mind blown.

The gym daycare allows us to drop off our kids for a couple of hours everyday. So three days a week I go to the gym to workout. The other two days? I go there to work on my business. I drop them off, head to the café and pound away on the keyboard. The added bonus that relieves my guilt is the kids love it there! They get to run around like crazy and hang out with other kids their age.

If you belong to a gym already try this! It is an amazing two hours! If you don’t belong to a gym, check out this idea. It has really given me a ton of time back in my work schedule and my kids an opportunity to do something fun.

Working at home while the kids are out of school is tough! You want to scale back to spend time with them but you don’t want your blog to die. By setting a schedule with focus and boundaries you can find a good balance of family and work. Taking the time to work in the fringe hours will help you get the small blogging tasks done. And don’t be afraid to ask for help! Your work is important too and you deserve to have time to do it. By following these simple ideas you will enjoy your kids, your summer, and have a strong blog to go back to in the fall!

Your turn: What do you do to balance blogging and spending time with your kids? Do you have any tips you can share with us? Please share them in the comments below!