Blogging Advice

Ah the fine art of comparison. It’s something that kills our confidence, hurts our productivity, and damages our self-esteem.

Yet we all do it don’t we?

“She has more blog pageviews than me and started blogging after I did.”

“Her email list has 500 subscribers and yet I can’t seem to get more than 10 people to sign up for mine.”

“She’s making money blogging and she’s only been blogging for two months and I’ve been doing it for a year.”

I have heard these comments from bloggers many times. I have also said to myself. 

I think comparing ourselves to others isn’t about jealousy, well maybe it is a little bit. But I think it is about something more. I think it is about being confident in who we are and what we have to offer. I think it is about the belief that we will accomplish our dreams and goals.

Yet if we let ourselves spin in the cycle of comparison without pulling ourselves out, we are doomed to fail. If we manifest enough negativity about ourselves it is hard to overcome. So how do you stop this damaging cycle? You practice the following 9 steps.

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings

The first thing you must do is acknowledge how you are feeling. Put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard and write it out. Say “I am jealous of Beth because she has only been blogging for six months and she is making $3,000 a month and I want to make $3,000 a month.”

Whatever the comparison is that is going on in your head, acknowledge it. Don’t keep it in the darkness in your mind where it will fester. Write about what’s bugging you.

Then examine why it is bugging you. Are you upset because that $3,000 a month would change your family’s financial picture? Are you feeling jealous because it seems so easy for Beth? Or are you feeling scared that you will never have that kind of success in your blog or business?

When you get to the emotion behind the comparison it is much easier to deal with how you are feeling. You can name your emotions, your fears, and your worries. It brings light to those negative feelings. If you catch yourself in the comparison trap, take time to slow down, acknowledge it, and write how you are feeling.

2. You are Unique

The next thing I want you to do when you fall into the comparison trap is write about you. I want you to take 10 minutes and make a list of 10 things you are good at. You were uniquely wired with unique gifts and talents to give to the world. What are they? Make a list.

Here’s what I often have to remind myself. “Yes there are hundreds of bloggers that write about marketing and the business of blogging. But there is only one Jennifer Snyder. My voice, my perspective is unique to the world. What I have to offer to the world is good, useful, and helps people.”

The same is true for you. The world so desperately needs your uniqueness, your goodness, and your help right now. Take a look at your list of 10 gifts and talents when you are comparing yourself to someone else. Yes we need that person in this world sharing their gifts, but you know what? We need you too.

3. Read Your Testimonials

Reading my testimonials makes me feel better whenever I feel stuck. I have screen shots on my phone from testimonials I have received on Facebook. I save links on Facebook when someone compliments me. When people email me and tell me how much I have helped them, I star them to read when my confidence is shaky.

The work we are doing is sensitive. It is tied to us personally. We are giving of ourselves, our beings, through our writing, our coaching, our programs. That’s pretty intense isn’t it?

I think that’s why comparing ourselves to others can hurt so much. We are comparing our self-worth against someone else’s and that does not feel good. Save your testimonials for moments like this. When someone values your blog post or a coaching session you did changed someone’s perspective, save those testimonials. They remind you that you are in fact doing work that is helping other people. What you are doing has value and YOU have value!

4. Practice Gratitude

I heard this in church this past weekend, “Gratitude is medicine.” Let that sink in for a second. Gratitude is medicine.

When you feel like someone is ahead of you on the blogging or business journey, practice gratitude. Be thankful for all the things in your life that have led you to your blog. Be thankful that you had kids because now you can write that mom blog. Be thankful that you had that failed business because now you can encourage women that want to start a business.

When you are comparing yourself to other bloggers, other business owners, take a few minutes to remember your journey. Then be thankful for all the steps along the way that have gotten you to this point. Be thankful for what you have accomplished this far because I know it is a lot. Honor your process, your accomplishments, your journey. Honor yourself and be grateful.

5. Talk to Your Person

One of my favorite things to do when I get into this comparison funk is to talk to my people. My husband is really great at reminding me of my value and all the things I am good at. I am a lucky woman and I love him dearly for that. Yet sometim
es I need a different perspective.

Is that wrong or needy? Nope and here’s why.

Yes, my husband is my rock, my person, but we don’t have the same career. He is off in his financial advising world and doesn’t understand blogging or online business. Bless his heart, he tries, but he isn’t here in the trenches doing it. Just like I am not in the trenches building a financial advising practice.

But you know who is there with him? His co-workers. His fellow financial advisers that have been there and are going through the same things. When he talks to these people he feels less alone and gets good ideas on how to improve his business.

Sounds nice doesn’t it?!

Did you know the same resources are available to you? No you may not have co-workers, but there are fellow bloggers and online business owners in your space that will get what you are feeling. Take time to get to know people online and connect with them. Help them and give to them. Then when you need it they will be there for you.

And when you do need their help, get honest with them. Say “hey I am struggling because I am comparing myself to Beth Blogger who’s killing it and I am not. It’s making me feel like crap.” I promise you if you allow yourself to have authentic connections like this with people online, you will find a support system that will bring you up when you are down. I know I am thankful for mine!

6. Don’t Compare Your Beginning to Someone Else’s Middle

One of my favorite quotes ever is by Jon Acuff “Don’t compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.”

YES!!!

I was so guilty of this until I read this quote a few years ago. I would think: “Well Jane has 10,000 people on her email list and is making $50,000 a month blogging.”

Of course she is! Jane has been blogging for 10 years and knows her niche. She has programs and services to meet the needs of her followers. But Jane didn’t start out that way.

Jane started out like you. She had a handful of blog posts, 23 people on her email list, was blogging 60 hours a week, and making zero every month. Like you Jane worked her butt off to make something of her blog and turn it into a business. But it took time, trial and error, lots of mistakes, and a handful of wins to get there.

This is something that has been bothering me when I publish my income reports. I worry that women will read them and compare themselves to me. I swear every time I publish one of those reports I want to add an amendment called “But Wait.” But wait, you don’t know this is my third blog. But wait, you don’t know that I have floundered in another business. But wait, you don’t know the personal trauma I had to go through to get here.

But wait.

My journey is different than yours and yours is different than mine. We will all arrive at our destination as long as we keep trying, keep putting ourselves out there, and keep helping other people.

Think about Jane’s journey when you compare yourself to her. She didn’t start out huge, but she did work hard to get where she is. Don’t compare Jane’s middle to your beginning. Instead learn from her and then help others when you get to the top!

And promise me you will take the income reports that I publish, and that other people publish with a grain of salt? Add a “but wait amendment” to them after you read them okay?

7. Befriend Them

I have to share with you one of the kindest things someone ever did for me in business. This blogger was having her own comparison moment with me. Me?! Truly I was shocked by this. I admired this blogger, still do, and think she is one of the best writers and people I have met. So for her to compare herself to me was hard for me to fathom.

You know what she did? She reached out to me. She said in not so many words, I was feeling jealous of where you are and I thought instead of feeling that way, I would reach out to you and get to know you, and find out what you are doing that’s working.

Talk about a slice of humble pie for me. It still gives me goose bumps.

What this blogger did was not only kind, it was smart. Instead of being jealous of me or comparing herself to me, she reached out and got to know me. She took time to get on the phone with me and talk about what’s bugging her about her business. In turn, it gave me the opportunity to share what was bugging me in my business. Because while it may look good on the outside it isn’t all roses on the inside.

By reaching out to me this blogger gave us the opportunity to squash the comparison monster. It gave us the chance to have an authentic conversation which isn’t easy online these days. In this conversation we helped each other and a friendship was born. Talk about turning something negative into a huge positive!

If you are really stuck comparing yourself to a blogger or a business owner reach out to them! Get to know them through the blog or website. Engage with them and start a conversation. You might find someone new that gets where you are, where you are going, and wants to be your friend. Not a bad way to kill the comparison monster is it?!

8. Take a Break

The internet is a lonely place! It is filled with only the best Facebook memories and events isn’t it? We all make our posts to look so pretty. Life is so perfect on Facebook isn’t?!

Except it’s not. And we have to remember that we are reading our newsfeed through a rose-filtered lens.

When you find the comparison monster getting you, take a break from the internet. Get off Facebook for a few days. Pull yourself away from the rose-colored view and back into the real world where it is messy and not perfect.

While you are on this break do something physical that is productive. Go for a run, de-clutter your bedroom, or do a craft with your kids. Do something physical to take your mind off comparing yourself to other people. Doing this breathes life back into you as a person. Remember at the end of the day, you are awesome and more than who you are on the internet.

9. Your Season of Life

Okay true confession time. Pretty much every single day I have to remind myself where I am in my season of life. When I see other bloggers or online business owners doing so much better than me, I remind myself where I am in my life.

It’s not that I forget I am raising these little people, but somehow I do when I compare myself to others.

Yet everyone else gives me a break but me. You know what everyone says to me when I tell them I have three kids, ages 7, 4, and 3?

Wow you have your hands full.

You are dang right I do! Now why can’t I ever remember that when I am comparing myself to other people?

I have to remind myself constantly that I might in fact be farther ahead if I had more time to work on my business. As it sits I have about 2-4 hours every day to work on it. It sounds like a lot, but it really isn’t. Many of those hours are interrupted by shuttling kids to preschool, putting them down for naps, and cooking dinner. Plus a million other things. I am working on my business in the fringe hours, including when I am exhausted and not at my best.

The truth is we are all at a different season of life. Some of us have to blog in the fringe hours because we work a full-time job from 8-5. Some of us are surrounded by little people and trying to build blogs between preschool drop off and nap time. Some of us have part-time help and some of us can’t afford it right now. When you find yourself comparing yourself to others, make sure you are comparing your seasons of life too.

Comparing yourself to others is human nature, especially for us women. We are good at being hard on ourselves. My hope is that after reading this post you will give yourself some grace. Heck I hope I will give myself some grace too! You are doing the best you can lady! I am thankful that you are out in the world sharing your unique voice with us!

On Thanksgiving Day 2014 I woke up at 6am, far earlier than anyone else at my house. I was not thrilled about being awake at all. It was dark and it was cold (really cold– more on that later), and my reason for being awake did not thrill me either.

The Turkey Trot

A few weeks before Thanksgiving I agreed to do the Turkey Trot 5k in St. Paul with three of my friends. Now I had done one 5k, about a month before Thanksgiving I ran my first one in honor of breast cancer. That one meant something to me. I was running it on the 5 year anniversary to the date of the day my cousin passed away from breast cancer. She was only 28. I did it to honor her memory and her hard fight against that awful disease. That 5k I could get behind and I felt a little spiritual push the whole way.

The Turkey Trot? Not so much. This one felt more like peer pressure to me, but kind of like fun too.

Now if you would have ever told me that I said a 5k was fun I would have laughed at you. Laughed hard until I cried. You see I vowed never to be one of those people that was going to run for fun. I was never going to be one of those “crazies.” I hated running and had no desire to be a runner.

A Million Excuses

Yet here I was, this very cold November morning getting ready to run the Turkey Trot. It was -6 in temperature, not wind chill, but temperature, at race time. It was the coldest Thanksgiving in the Twin Cities in 30 years.  I was here ready to run the Turkey Trot. Something I vowed I would never do and especially not in the dead cold of winter. Even worse, I had barely slept the night before as my youngest was up every hour because of a cold. I wasn’t in the best of moods and I had a million excuses running through my head of why I didn’t have to go to this race. Even my friends were shocked when they came to pick me up that I came out the front door.

Sure peer pressure got me here and a little bit of fun got me here, but you want to know what really got me to that starting line? Taking a leap out of my comfort zone and doing something that challenged me. A giant leap. I am not a runner, I don’t even consider myself in shape, but I was up for trying something new, something different and something that would be a challenge. Why not? As long as it wouldn’t kill me, I was game for it. I was nervous and I was scared of course. I was worried that I would be the only one there that would have to walk, that my friends would leave me in the dust, and would be waiting for me for an hour at the finish line. I was even kind of scared that I would trip and fall flat on my face or even worse break something. But I was determined to step out of my comfort zone and try something new. Something that was for me, something that would challenge me, something that was for personal growth.

Myself (1st on the left) and my 3 crazy friends

My Comfort Zone

In 2016 I took a huge leap of faith and stepped outside of my comfort zone. You see I had been involved in the real estate industry as far back as I could remember. I remember “working” in the family business as early as age seven. By the time I was 10 I was being paid to type real estate appraisals. Over the years I worked as an assistant to appraisers, title closers, and Realtors. I spent time working as a Loan Officer for five years and got out just before the market tanked. But right around that time I took off on my own branch of real estate and began doing real estate marketing.

Then last year happened and something inside of me said, after 27 years in the same industry, it was time to be done. It was time to try the dream that had been on my heart for the last few years. I would love to say “and just like that Women Winning Online was born.” But that wouldn’t be the whole story. That wouldn’t tell you how absolutely terrified I was to leave an industry that I knew like the back of my hand, to pursue something that was just a dream. Something that I had no idea what I was doing and if it would work or not.

But just like the Turkey Trot, I knew if I didn’t do it, I would always wonder if I could.  I would always wonder if I missed something that would be good for me. That would stretch me and take me far outside of my comfort zone of real estate.

On February 8th, one day after my 37th birthday, Women Winning Online was officially born. I was officially outside of my comfort zone and on a new journey.

Your Comfort Zone

Every day we have the opportunity to step outside our comfort zones, but we rarely do. We have a million excuses of why we don’t have to. It’s scary. We don’t want to fail. We don’t want to look dumb. We don’t have time. We don’t have money. Yet when we take that challenge and do something different, a small piece of us changes and usually for the better.

As a blogger you have the opportunity to step outside of your comfort zone on a daily basis and become better at what you do. To take a challenge that will push you as a blogger. To do something different that you haven’t done before like sending out your first email newsletter or finally launching that program that has been on your mind for years.

You have the opportunity to evaluate what is and isn’t working for your blog. Is it time to let go of your Facebook page because it isn’t bringing you in much traffic and focus on Instagram instead? Or is it worth it to start investing in your blog and in yourself to learn marketing ideas that will help you grow? It’s hard to invest in ourselves isn’t it? We worry that we aren’t worth the investment or that our efforts won’t work. We worry that we will waste our time and our money and end up right where we were before. Or worse, right where we were before with nothing to show for it and less money in our pocketbooks too.

But what if you stepped outside of your comfort zone? What if you took the time to invest in you? It could mean the difference between saying stuck where you are right now or taking that leap of faith and watching your blog grow in ways you’ve only dreamed of. Then would it be worth it to step outside of your comfort zone?

As the summer comes to a close, we are gearing up to get back to our blogs. Back to the routine and the consistency that this season brings before the holidays hit. Before we know it we are going to be knee deep in blog planning and goal setting for next year. I would venture to guess that you had a good year blogging but you want to do even more in 2017.

You know how you get there? You add working outside your comfort zone into your plans for next year. Yes, keep doing the blogging tasks that you know, that you love, and that you are good at, but take it one step further next year. Do marketing that you have always wanted to try but were too scared to do. Launch a program that will help your niche become better. Step outside of your comfort zone. That is where the magic happens, where growth as a blogger happens. This is the point where you and your blog really starts to grow and change for the better.

As for me, I can look back at 2016 and feel thrilled that I took that leap of faith. Whew! That scary leap of leaving the only industry I had known for 27 years. Not only did I get to follow my true passion, but I have met and helped some amazing women along the way. I know that 2017 is going to be a great year for all of us and that for me, my leap of faith outside of my comfort zone was worth it.

Oh and by the way it’s been almost two years since that 5k and I am still doing them and I still don’t love them! I wonder if that will ever change?!

What are your goals for your blog this fall and into 2017? Are you going to do the same things you did in 2016 or are you going to up your game and try new things? Please tell me about your plans in the comments below! Thank you!

Congratulations! You started that blog you’ve been dying to write for years and you’re excited. You live and breathe blogging. You soak up every post you can find on how to blog. You try experiments to see what is working and what isn’t working to drive traffic.

You have a blog and it’s safe to say you are in love.

If you are married, the start of your blog can also bring the start of problems in your marriage. I experienced this with my first blog. I was so in love with my blog! I was writing about ideas that had swirled around in my head for years. I was getting comments on my posts and attention on social media. I ate, breathed, and slept my blog.

The problem is when you become obsessed with blogging it is hard to make room for anything or anyone else. This includes your marriage, your family, and your friends.

And I get it. Not only do you love blogging, but it has the potential to bring in money that can support your whole family. That’s intoxicating!

But what if you work so hard to build your blog, are successful, and have no one left to enjoy it with?

It’s a sobering thought isn’t it? This is a slippery slope for sure, but the good news is that it’s avoidable if you recognize it can happen. Here are my five tips to blog-proof your marriage.

1. Schedule time with your spouse

As bloggers it is so easy to work after dinner or after the kids go to sleep. We think “this is our time to work.” We crave a few uninterrupted hours to write and edit our posts. To learn about social media and network with other bloggers. We have worked hard all day in our 9-5 or with our kids and we are ready to get our blog on!

But think back before you started blogging. Remember how after the kids went to bed it was time for you and your spouse to hang out? To debrief and learn about each other’s day. Or to connect about bigger things going on in your life. Now the minute the last kid is in bed you pop open your laptop and breathe a sigh of relief. Ah time to blog.

But I bet the majority of bloggers, myself included, don’t think about how this makes our spouse feel. They are used to connecting with us at night. Without a word we changed from connecting with them to connecting with our blog. That has to feel lonely for them.

How to fix it: When you don’t blog full-time, blogging at night is important. You need that time. But you also need time with your spouse to connect and unwind. My husband and I pick three days a week where I don’t work at night. This always includes Friday and Saturday night unless he is out. We also pick one night during the week to hang out even if it only means watching TV. When I give him my full attention those nights he feels important. He doesn’t mind when I am working the other three nights of the week.

P.S. Your spouse watching TV and you blogging doesn’t count as quality time! Your head is still in the blogging game and not connected with your spouse!

2. Put your phone down

Full confession: I am writing this point with full disclosure that I am the worst person I know at putting my phone down. If my husband could chime in here he would tell you all about it. Good thing it’s my blog so he can’t! 🙂

Blogging has become a mobile sport with the invention of smartphones and tablets, and I for one love that! With one little device I can connect with the women in my Facebook group, reply to blog comments, and schedule social media posts. Heck I can write a blog post from my phone if I want to. It’s awesome!

What’s not so awesome is when we abuse the technology. Sure we put down our laptops to stop blogging, but then we pick up our phones. We get in our Facebook groups, join Twitter chats, or work on graphics for our posts. We are still blogging, we’ve just changed the tool we are using to do it.

How to Fix It: This is something I am working on myself. Here’s are some simple things I have come up with. No phone at the dinner table or in bed. No phone on the nights designated as our time to hang out. Use it sparingly in the mornings when you and your spouse are getting ready for the day. Treat your phone like your laptop and give it boundaries. Like I said, this list is just as much for me as it is for you– maybe even more for me!

3. Go to bed at the same time

For the majority of our relationship, I usually went to bed after my husband. He would go to bed around 10pm and I would work until one or two in the morning. I figured why not? He was sleeping anyway so it’s not like I was missing quality time with him.

Yet I was missing quality time and I didn’t even realize it. And no, not that kind of quality time. There’s something about ending the day together that helps strengthen the marriage bond. Checking on the kids, brushing teeth, and a little pillow talk before shutting off the lights. There is intimacy in those small moments. Moments that you miss if you don’t go to bed at the same time as your spouse.

How to fix it: The nights that you choose as “couple nights” make sure to go to bed at the same time too. Those nights will fill you both up for the nights you stay up late and work on your blog. Every once in awhile shut down your work on the non-couple nights and go to bed with your spouse. It will make you both feel better!

4. Be an active listener

Active listening is something else I struggle with too. I see my husband talking but I don’t actually hear what he is saying. I nod my head in agreement and he knows me well enough to know that I wasn’t paying attention. Yes, I have put my phone and laptop away, but I haven’t shut my brain off. I am thinking about blog posts, my Facebook group, or mom stuff. But I am not being an active listener when he speaks and that isn’t fair to him.

How to Fix It: Now this is one I don’t think we can fix 100% of the time. We are women after all and we have a lot going on upstairs! But we can work on it in each conversation we have with our spouse.

Let your brain know when it is couple or date night. I say to myself “Okay tonight is couple night, time to focus on that and not the blog or the kids.” This simple reminder changes my focus from thinking about everything, to focusing on what my husband is saying.

5. Date night

You’re busy, your spouse is busy, and if you have kids you don’t even remember what it is like to not be busy. Now you are blogging on top of all this busyness. When do you make time to get out as a couple and enjoy yourselves? It’s hard to find the time isn’t it?

Yet there is something magical when you can get away from the house, the kids, your blog and enjoy a night on the town with your spouse. You feel renewed, your spouse feels renewed, and you marriage feels lighter. In our house, date nights aren’t an option but a necessity for survival.

How to Fix It: When was the last time you went on a date with your spouse? The last time you put it all away, put on nice clothes and gasp!– some make-up? If it has been awhile schedule a date night with your spouse. To keep date nights on the calendar take turns planning them every other month.

Blogging is a fun business, but it can be hard on your marriage if you aren’t careful. It is easy to get sucked into your blog and making it a success. But you don’t want to have all that success at the expense of your marriage.

Take time to walk away from your computer and phone at night to reconnect with your spouse. Give your spouse the best part of you by listening to them when they talk. Make sure to schedule couple time and date nights away from the house to connect with your spouse. Then when your blog becomes a raving success your number one fan will be there to share it with you!

Ah summer, my favorite season. Warmer days, longer nights, pool, and lake time. The kids are out of school and I dream about all the fun things we are going to do. This summer we are going to do it all I declare.

But then I panic. Sheer anxiety interrupts my daydream. I am a writer, a blogger, and I run a business. How am I going to manage that while the kids are on summer break?

Before a complete meltdown set in I knew I had to get a plan together and fast. You see my kids are at an age where we can do cool stuff this summer. I created this blog so I could have the free time to spend with them and not stick them in daycare while I slaved away at work.

I knew I had to create a balance between work and my kids. It’s an ongoing practice for me. I know there are weeks that are more kid heavy and weeks that are more heavy on the work side. I know for the next 8 weeks or so, my life will be more kid heavy and I need my blog to work around that schedule.

Are you feeling the same pull? You want to spend more time with your kids, but you want your blog to keep running? Here are my 9 tips to help you balance the two as best you can.

1. Make a Summer Schedule

I am a big planner. My lists have lists. So I knew the first thing I needed to do was create a summer schedule for myself and the kids. Now it being summer I didn’t want to make it too rigid. The entire school year is dedicated to a rigid schedule. But I wanted to make sure my blogging time was in our summer schedule. If I don’t schedule my blogging activities, including writing, they don’t get done.

Here’s what my schedule looks like this summer:

There is one thing that I don’t show on this schedule. Grace. I give myself grace when it doesn’t go according to plan. Today for example, I slept in and didn’t work on my blog post. It felt good and my body needed the break. Giving yourself grace with your schedule makes you more likely to stick to it instead of hating it.

P.S. I need to give credit to my ultra organized bloggy friend Suzi of Start a Mom Blog. She is fantastic when it comes to helping mom’s with their schedules!

2. Focus

Oh focus. You and I have a battle every day don’t we? Followed closely by your cousin self-discipline.

Here is what I do when I write a blog post.

• Check Facebook one last time before I start.
• Write my outline
• Check Facebook again
• Write my opening intro, “think” I’m stuck, check email.
• Get lost in the rabbit hole of email. Then go back to my post.
• Write a bit more and check Facebook for the 14th time today.

I wish I had a zapper for every time I strayed away from what I am supposed to be working on! But I realized if I have ANY shot of sticking to my schedule and enjoying time with my kids, I had to focus on the task at hand.

That means no Facebook and no email until I write the draft for my blog post. That means writing in 30 minute increments and giving myself a 5 minute break. That means being a grown up and realizing the more I focus, the easier it is to get the task done.

But I still wouldn’t mind that zapper. 😉

3. Boundaries

Setting boundaries is something else I struggle with. I have worked at home for 10 years now. People always say to me “I could never work at home because I would do laundry or clean the kitchen.”

Well I have the opposite problem. I am terrible at turning the work off.

Sure I can walk away from the computer when nap time is over, but then I take my handy iPhone with me everywhere I go. I check my Facebook group, I see if I have new email subscribers, or blog comments. I research new ways to drive traffic or new marketing ideas.

Before I know it I am wrapped up in work and snapping at my kids who just want my attention. That very attention I want to pour on them. The irony is not lost on me here. I am building a business that works around their schedule and not vice versa. Yet here I am putting the work ahead of their needs.

So I have to set boundaries, follow the designated work schedule I set out, and stick to it. This way I can enjoy the time with my kids to the fullest and not feel like a crappy mom.

4. Cut Back on Posting

If you are posting more than three days a week on your blog, I suggest cutting back on that during the summer. Heck, I don’t think that is a good idea anyway, but especially not during the summer.

If you try to keep up with a demanding posting schedule while your kids are home you will get frustrated. Unless you have outside help, you can’t write that often and spend quality time with your kids. I tried this and it was terrible. My content was awful and my mothering was not good.

Give yourself a break, enjoy your kids this summer, and cut back on your posting schedule! Let your readers know you are still blogging, just not as much during the summer. They will understand and respect you for it.

And hey, you might find that once school starts again that you like the lighter posting schedule. It might be just the thing to put a zip back into your writing!

5. Get Sleep

I made a startling confession to my best friend, Marci, last week. I like love getting up early now. Her gasp of shock made me realize how huge this is.

Up until a couple of years ago, I was a grown woman, mother of three, that loved to stay up until 1, 2, sometimes 3am working. I loved working while everyone was asleep and the house was quiet. I came alive about 9pm every night and my husband would say, “Guess it’s going to be a late night for you.”

But then one day it caught up with me. I couldn’t do it anymore. I would stay up late and was crabby the next day. I wasn’t at my best for my kids. My writing started to suffer. With the lack of sleep I found that I couldn’t think right and it was no longer worth it. So I started to go to bed at 10pm like normal people and get up early like normal people.

The result? I am happier, more productive, and enjoy my life more. Now if you would have told 30-year-old me that, I would have laughed at you. But with age comes wisdom and part of that wisdom includes getting a good night’s sleep.

And Marci, I know I can hardly believe I am writing this either. What happened to me?!

6. Look for Fringe Hours

Now that I am a grown up and get sleep, I have discovered I love the fringe hours! Fringe hours are the bonus hours you can work while your family is doing something else. I can get up at 5am and get two hours of work done before I am called to be a wife and a mom. Those are my favorite two hours every day! The house is quiet, I got a good night’s sleep, and once the coffee kicks in I am firing on all cylinders.

But the morning hours aren’t my only fringe hours. I also do blog tasks during certain times of the day. At lunch I let the kids watch TV and I do some work then. While my youngest is napping, my girls spend the first 30 minutes doing their own thing while I work. If we go to the park I will take that time to catch up on social media.

There are many different times during the day where my kids don’t need me. They are playing together or doing their own thing. During this time I will focus on easy blog tasks. It helps me stay on track without feeling like I am ignoring my kids.

7. Get a Babysitter

Mondays are my favorite day of the week. Crazy right?! Mondays are the one day a week I have a nanny come into my house to care for my kids.

I get a much-needed break from the kids (hey, I’m not super mom!) and the kids get interaction with someone besides their parents. I get to work in peace and quiet and focus on the big tasks at hand.

If you are struggling to find extra time, look at bringing in a babysitter if your budget allows it. Maybe you need a full day like me. Or maybe you can get by with three hours on Monday afternoon. There isn’t a law that says just because you stay home with your kids, that you can’t bring in help once in a while. You will be better off for it and so will your kids.

If you can’t fit a sitter into your budget, is there a mom in your area you can trade with? My best friend and I take turns watching each other’s kids so we can go on date nights with our husbands. Try to find another mom blogger in your area that you connect with and take turns helping each other out.

8. Ask your Spouse for Help

There is no shame whatsoever in asking for your husband’s help. If you need a break to work on your blog, ask your husband for help! My husband and I have an agreement that if I need a night off to write, he will come home from work and takeover. I leave the house right when he gets there and he is in charge of dinner and bedtime. When things get really busy we do this once a week. As an added bonus it gives my husband some one-on-one time with the kids. And they love to soak up their dad’s attention making it a win-win for all!

If you need the help ask your husband. He isn’t going to know you need help unless you ask. And don’t feel guilty about it either! Don’t forget you are at home with your kids and that is work all by itself. You have spent the time with them so now go spend some time on you.

9. Join a Gym

I joined a gym to exercise and lose weight, but there is an added benefit I didn’t realize at first. The kids daycare at the gym. Oh how I love that place!

When you drop your kids off they always ask you where you are going to be. One day the woman in front of me said “The Cafe.” I said “Wait a minute, hold the phone. It’s okay to drop the kids off and sit in the gym’s cafe?” They replied “We don’t care what you do, as long as you don’t leave the building.”

Mind blown.

The gym daycare allows us to drop off our kids for a couple of hours everyday. So three days a week I go to the gym to workout. The other two days? I go there to work on my business. I drop them off, head to the café and pound away on the keyboard. The added bonus that relieves my guilt is the kids love it there! They get to run around like crazy and hang out with other kids their age.

If you belong to a gym already try this! It is an amazing two hours! If you don’t belong to a gym, check out this idea. It has really given me a ton of time back in my work schedule and my kids an opportunity to do something fun.

Working at home while the kids are out of school is tough! You want to scale back to spend time with them but you don’t want your blog to die. By setting a schedule with focus and boundaries you can find a good balance of family and work. Taking the time to work in the fringe hours will help you get the small blogging tasks done. And don’t be afraid to ask for help! Your work is important too and you deserve to have time to do it. By following these simple ideas you will enjoy your kids, your summer, and have a strong blog to go back to in the fall!

Your turn: What do you do to balance blogging and spending time with your kids? Do you have any tips you can share with us? Please share them in the comments below!

Last year I stepped back into exercising. After having back-to-back babies, let’s just say it had been awhile since I worked out. I ordered the 21 Day Fix by Beachbody through an old college friend of mine to get me started.

I literally thought I was going to die when I started this workout. I remember getting through the warm up and the instructor on the DVD said “Alright are you warmed up?” “Warmed up?” I thought. “Um no I am dying, I am past warmed up.” I started these workouts in February of last year and I remember wanting to throw up halfway through each one. What was I doing to myself?!

Another favorite quote from this instructor on the DVD is “I just want you to be better than you were yesterday.” Somewhere in there I took it to heart. I knew that by pushing through and taking one step or doing one more rep I would be better than I was yesterday. I also realized that by being better than I was yesterday that the workouts would get easier. It was then that I realized that I would start to achieve my weight loss goals.

Alright, this is a blog about blogging, marketing and online business. What does my weight loss journey have to do with this blog?!